My Big Fat Secret

This is a continuation of my whole-foods, plant-based lifestyle journey that began January of 2015. I am sharing this journey as part of the Write 28 Days Blogging Challenge. 

Shame is Powerful...

I have always felt a lot of shame around food.  When I was in the first grade my mother threatened to make me wear a girdle to school. She was worried about my weight and felt the need to limit my food intake. Goodby after school snack. I really missed my snacks. I learned to sneak food at a very young age. For a six year old, I developed some serious stealth manuevers.  After tucking me in bed each night my mother would join my father in the living room where they would watch television.  When I felt they were duly occupied, I would make my way from my bedroom to the kitchen.  This required that I crawl behind the sofa where they were sitting.  Once in the kitchen I would slowly open the cabinet and quietly extract two cookies.  Then I made my way back to my bedroom. Some nights two cookies were not enough and a second mission was necessary.  I don't remember ever getting caught. My parents certainly didn't think me bold enough nor smart enough to execute such a plan.

Fast forward fifty years.  I returned to Whole Foods every Monday for the Engine 2 Challenge.  I became more confident with the passing of each week.  We gradually eliminated animal foods from our diet and learned about the life saving qualities of plants.  By the end of challenge I had gone from one end of the spectrum to the other, however, there was one big road block that kept me from being 100% plant-based.  I couldn't tell anyone about my progress because my new lifestyle was a big fat secret. I was ashamed that I had to resort to to this kooky way of eating just to lose weight and be healthy.  I didn't know enough to explain it to others. Most of all, I wanted to enjoy my progress without scrutiny.  I still cooked the food my husband expected and he never noticed I wasn't eating the meat.  To avoid suspicion when we ate out, I ordered salmon. We still enjoyed our Sunday morning bacon and egg breakfast. My new lifestyle went unnoticed.

The Secret Revealed...

One day, my secret was exposed.  I posted a plant-based recipe on Facebook.  It came from a well know vegan blogger.  My daughter saw the post and texted me to ask if I was following a vegan diet because she had given up eating animal products in January.  What a shock.  We both took the same path at the same time.  My daughter does not do kooky things so maybe my decision to follow this plant-based lifestyle was not so bizarre.  That little spark of hope I had safeguarded was ignited. I had a plant-based friend now and it was my daughter.  💗